Ignorance is bliss...

There is perhaps no truer statement...now, I will grant you that ignorance of all things or certain crucial things is not good...but there is something very freeing about being ignorant of things. I know that when I was pregnant with Bailey, after reaching that 12 week milestone I was completely ignorant of any other serious problem that I might have to deal with. That ignorance didn't save me from the tragedy that happened...but I was oblivious to the danger and completely happy and content with the progress of our pregnancy up to that point.

That hard life lesson has taught me several things...and I am no longer ignorant of what can go horribly wrong, even when everything seems to be moving along perfectly. So, this pregnancy with "Bob" has not been as blissfully ignorant. It's really more an anxious paranoia. That paranoia seemed almost too justified this morning when they couldn't initially find "Bob's" heartbeat on the doppler at my appointment. In a split second, I was back in that room at my 39 week appointment with Bailey being told that there was no heartbeat. I thought I was going to lose all composure. Fortunately, after what seemed like minutes, but was probably only a few seconds, she found the heartbeat...faint at first and then strong and beating at 144 beats per minute.

Well, my paranoia now approaching full psychological breakdown led me to raise some concerns with my doctor about a few things that seemed "off" with the pregnancy over the past couple of weeks. Those concerns, echoed by a few of his own and some questionable tests led me to the hospital. After calling Wil from the doctor's office (I conveniently had left my cell phone in his car) to let him know that I was headed to the hospital, I drove over to Labor and Delivery and was admitted. During my time there, they monitored the fetal heartrate, conducted a full fetal biophysical profile, conducted a physical exam, and ran tests. No conclusive results, but all seemed to be fine and fluid levels seemed to be fine even though there is a potential that I may be leaking amniotic fluid.

They released me from the hospital with the guidance to rest, go to my appointment with Perinatal Specialist on Monday and then back to the OB doctor on Tuesday or Wednesday. They suggested that the Perinatal Specialist may want to conduct some sort of amnio-type test that shoots some sort of dye in the uterus to see if there are leaks. Sounds like something you do with your car or your household plumbing, not a person...but what do I know.

So, at this point...I still feel that something isn't right...they are monitoring the situation, but there isn't much we can do without further information. I hope to know more Monday...and until then I'll have my paranoia to keep me company.